It's finally December in PA. As I sit in bed staring outside wishing it would warm up and seeing the snow on the ground, a little part of me becomes depressed because I missed the time when we lived in California and wished we didn't have to leave. All my friends were there and we had so much stuff to do. Now it feels like we moved to someone what's cold dreary and has nothing.
My parents bought me a very thick comforter so if it gets cold in the house we don't need the heating on all the time and it keeps me warm. My husband comes barging in the room tipping all the clothes upside-down from the baskets because he can't find specific clothes he wants to wear. He only has four t-shirts that are suitable for his work for him to wear and yet he argues with me saying that I have to get his clothes ready but knowing that as soon as I give him clothes to wear he will be like I want to wear the jeans today. Well, sorry love but u wear what I give u. If u want to wear the jeans YOU wash them and YOU do laundry. Sometimes I feel that he never wanted our son because if he is like this now whenever we have a kid or adopt a kid that's at a young age that he has to wash clothes for if I'm not there to whether he will do it or not. He said he cried when I lost him. How can I believe something like that when he barely shows emotions anyway and would rather play his video games than help me babysit my nephews. Said that he doesn't want to be 'bored'
With all the flaws he has, I still love him and would do anything for him and I know that through all the anger and upset he loves me still deep down.
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